More dancing

The instructor who started teaching dance at the youth center on Saturday evenings (website here) also leads a same sex dance "club" on Monday evenings at a local club (where "local" means "Hillcrest, the main LGBT neighborhood in San Diego"). He kept trying to convince me to attend, since I was enjoying the lessons at the youth center so much, and last night I took the plunge. It was very psychologically challenging, because I have a hard enough time going to social events by my self in the first place and the fact that I didn't know anybody just exacerbated that. Add in self-consciousness about my gender (which no amount of external affirmation ever seems to reduce) and uncertainty about how the other club members would react, and I was a pretty huge bundle of nerves when I got there.I was also nervous about being carded on my way in, as I don't have my new driver's license yet and the current picture is... well... not exactly a great match for the way I look now. (That will be fixed soon!) There wasn't anybody checking ID at the door, but after I wandered around for a minute trying to figure out how to get into the room with the dance club, the bartender himself asked to see my ID. I walked up smiling and said "you're going to love this" as I handed him my ID, much to a nearby patron's amusement. The bartender looked at the picture, then looked back at me with a questioning look. I grinned and nodded, he looked down and up again, then smiled politely and handed it back. I thanked him and - after getting directions - headed in to the dance room.I was the first person there, so I spent a while dancing with the instructor's assistant, who is a straight female who jokingly refers to herself as a gay man in a woman's body. (To which I replied with a chuckle, "yeah, I can sort of relate to that.") More club members trickled in over time, and we ended up with two other girls and three guys. The girls, of course, were built in a way that always makes me feel intensely embarrassed about my frame: slender torsos and arms with very distinct outward flair at the hips. Rather bad for my ego (which is already pretty dang fragile), but I ignored that and focused on dancing. I'm not sure about the girls, but two of the guys were clearly gay, and I was informed that the third was straight. None of them appeared to have any issues with dancing with me, so that's a positive.Once there were six of us there - fortunately with an even blend of leaders and followers - we went through all of the dances, changing partners after every second or third song and learning new steps along the way. By the end of the night, we had done the waltz, foxtrot, swing, cha cha, rhumba, tango and samba. The latin dances are my favorites by far - especially the cha cha and the rhumba - as the following is a bit less demanding and there is a lot more hip action, and I'm really enjoying the opportunity to practice open, uninhibited body movement. It feels quite natural, like coming home to a whole dimension of motion that I had always eschewed in the past. Swing is my absolute least favorite, as the tempo in some of the swing songs is so insanely fast that I can't even move quickly enough to keep up. That may change in time, I suppose, and I do like some of the steps, so I guess we'll see what happens.By the end of the night (around 9:45, having started at 7:00), I was worn out, drenched in sweat and quite happy about attending. I am still a bit uncomfortable about the gender subject, but that is coming entirely from within, as nobody there made a big deal about it. I'm also a bit flummoxed about what to do for footwear, as my choices in leather-soled dancing shoes are going to be incredibly limited by the size of my feet, to say nothing about my aversion to feminine shoes.Hopefully I will be able to focus on the positives and ignore the negatives enough to go again next week, since it really did prove to be a thoroughly enjoyable evening, with lots of exercise to boot (so to speak).